last summer, once i started moving around again, i convinced mike i could ride my bike. i was sure it would be the perfect exercise- easy enough without putting too much strain on my back. i spent an entire afternoon washing and shining good ol Lucky. i pumped her tires and gingerly (and nervously) got back in the saddle. it felt amazing to be moving! i didn’t go far from home because i knew mike was pacing in the yard, waiting for me to return safely. i stopped to take some pictures of our first trek in too long. it was all very liberating after spending months in bed, immobile.
alas, it turned out to be a not-so-good idea. i was sad to admit it (because i gleefully posted about being on the road again), so i just let Lucky sit in the garage, telling myself that i really, really would rider her again. one day.
well, it took a long time to heal but today i took off on Lucky again. it felt invigorating and wonderful all over again. riding my bike has always been a peaceful escape since i was a kid. it’s no different now. okay, it’s a little different. while going down hill, on my way to the post office this afternoon was fantastic- like flying, really! the ride back home (only ever so slightly up hill)- killed me. not killed me, but i was panting. like a dog. and struggling. a lot. i may have even had to walk the bike here and there. i felt pathetic and mad at myself. then i gently reminded proud jessica that she hasn’t exercised (more than walking) in a VERY long time (we’re talking about 2 years…). i had to remind that embarrassed, panting, sweaty girl that with time and riding more and more, it will feel easier. it will feel effortless and fun again. it will be exercise that i enjoy rather than a walk of shame. so, although our reunion was a little bitter-sweet, we are together again, Lucky and me. for better or worse.
my legs hurt.